The Warrior

Relationships need a connection, not just a caption

By Sandy Sanchez, Reporter

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Cesar Siete scrolled through his news feed and came across a picture of a couple watching Netflix, with an array of junk food splayed out in front of them. The picture was captioned “#CoupleGoals” along with a few heart-eyed emojis.

This is a common occurrence for him as he constantly sees “relationship goal” posts whenever he is scrolling through his social media. Siete, Div. 859, who is currently in a relationship, said the posts set “a certain standard that people have to get to.”

According to the Pew Research Center, teenagers talked about the reasons why couples might showcase their relationship with pictures and posts on social media. Reasons varied from seeking attention to letting others know that they are now “off the market.”

#CoupleGoals posts, according to Samantha Pham, Div. 883, are “representations of unrealistic relationship expectations displayed through social media.”  

Research has shown that the most popular posts shared on social media sites are pictures and the majority of the pictures consists of couples going on dates, giving each other gifts or showing their appreciation for one another.

Izabela Bilska, Div. 963, referred to #CoupleGoals posts as stupid and said the online displays of affection are “for attention and to show off how amazing their significant other is.”, a website dedicated to love and relationships, had an article criticizing these #CoupleGoals posts on how the idealistic photographs were most likely thoroughly planned out to showcase the best moments of the relationship.

The article went on to say that #CoupleGoals posts gained their popularity from people comparing their relationship to somebody else’s which allows social media to play a role in the relationship.

“It is good to show your relationship on social media, but it feels like the people who are actually posting that may be trying really hard to show how perfect their relationship may be,” Siete said.

A study, from the Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, has found that people who are more anxious about their relationship are more likely to go overboard with couple pictures on their social media.

Forbes magazine had an article talking about the impact that social media had on relationships. The article included words from Julia Rodgers, a co-founder of Holistic Divorce, an informational resource for people going through divorce.

Rodgers said that social media can influence the way people make friends but can put additional pressure on people’s romantic lives.

“I feel like [#CoupleGoals posts] are very staged.” Pham said “Anything on social media, posting things on social media means you have to play a part.”

Social media creates a false expectation of perfection that doesn’t exist, according to the Odyssey Online. They said people shouldn’t let the idea of what a relationship should be become ingrained into their minds

Cameron Cannady, Div. 856, said a relationship is when “two people who care about each other decide to get together and see where things go from there.”

No two relationships are the same and everyone has their own idea of what a relationship should be. A relationship is shaped by the people involved and expectations vary from person to person.

“To me, [A relationship] is more that I respect you, you respect me,” Cannady said. “We respect each other and we respect our privacy especially.”

Social media is used to present one’s best self, same thing goes for #CoupleGoals posts. The posts depict an isolated moment in the relationship and not their whole story.

“Relationships shouldn’t be based off of those posts. Social media is so toxic for relationships nowadays,” Ariana Rodriguez, Div. 879, said. “Don’t rely heavily on social media to define your relationship. It should be between you and the other person.”

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Relationships need a connection, not just a caption